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Sunday, July 24, 2016

How to Fix the Democrats' Problems in Philadelphia

The Democrat convention starts tomorrow in my hometown, Philadelphia.  To put it mildly, they have lots of problems.  They just dumped their national chairman, Debbie Wasserman Schultz from her speaking role at the convention.  They named congresswoman Marcia Fudge as the "permanent chair" of the convention in her place.  It's not even clear if Wasserman Schultz is going to be in Philadelphia this week.  All of this is the result of the devastating internal emails of the DNC that Wikileaks just released.  Those emails confirm that the DNC conspired both with the Clinton campaign and with the media to undermine Bernie Sanders and to help Hillary Clinton.  They also show that the DNC was arranging dirty tricks to use against the Trump campaign and the Republicans.  That's really bad.

Then there's today's terrorist attack in Reutlingen, Germany.  The terrorist was a machete-wielding supposed Syrian refugee who killed one and wounded two before a passing motorist used his car to stop the killing.  It's about the clearest possible confirmation that Donald Trump's position on Syrian refugees is correct and Hillary's is wrong.  That's terrible for the Dems.

Then there's the almost magical thinking being employed to respond to these problems.  Hillary's campaign manager actually blamed the Russians this morning for the emails on Wikileaks.  He did not deny that the emails were real or that they were accurately quoted.  Basically, he admitted that real internal emails filled with extremely damaging information were released, but he blamed the Russians for it.  Huh?  Even most of the media that is already in the tank for Hillary thought that was a bizarre claim and a major mistake.

Then there's Tim Kaine.  The Sanders' delegates are complaining loudly about him.  If there were no other problems, those complaints would die away, but now, who knows?

Wait until you hear the plans being discussed at the DNC to deal with these problems.  (I know about these plans because I got an email from Vladimir Putin telling me about them.)

First, the DNC is considering giving Ted Cruz a prime time speaking slot on the second day of the convention so that he can once again not endorse Trump.  They are worried, however, that senator Cruz might not endorse Hillary either, so this one is not yet fixed.

Second, since blaming the Russians for the DNC's conduct has not worked, the Clinton team is considering whether or not to announce the aliens are responsible.  Here too, although the campaign likes the idea of blaming beings from another planet, there has been concern about tying problems to aliens of any sort.  They think it makes them sound to Trumpian.

Third, Hillary is considering moving her acceptance speech to the first night of the convention and then leaving.  At least that way there won't be much chance of too much more going wrong.

Fourth, Hillary's foreign policy advisors have suggested getting Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi to fly in to address the convention on what a good president Hillary would make.  Al-Baghdadi has been contacted and has accepted the invitation, but on condition that he can appear with his back-up chorus of 50 men in costumes with distinctive vests.

If you have any ideas yourself for what the Democrats should do to get over this hurdle, send you suggestions to Wearelost@DNC.com 

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